As I type I am sitting in the airport waiting for a flight from Istanbul to Chicago. I missed check-in because traffic was so bad. Traffic here is the worst thing ever. We sat still one time for 30 minutes before edging up. It took us 2 hours to get to the airport. A city with 17 million people needs more than 2 bridges. Jacksonville has 7 bridges and we maybe have three million people, maybe. Any way, Lewis haggled with the people at the desk and we got it worked out. There were some very annoyed Brits behind me though. I had to check in and get my ticket at the London desk. Once again the America comes out victorious in the on going battle between mother country and daughter colony! Really that is too dramatic. They were just humans’ upset that I cut in line. So the analogy goes from a global scale to elementary school lunch line.
So in the last few days Baba has opened up a bit. Nothing major but he made fun of women twice and I laughed. The first time we were in the den and the kids were going crazy then lunch came. Immediate silence. He laughed and said, “What happened? Baby girl must have been born.” My mouth dropped then I laughed, hard. Then yesterday Benny wanted the water but he didn’t ask correctly so I said,
“How do you ask?”
“May I have some water please?”
“Or you could say, ‘Woman! Give me some water!” (Baba laughed)
Benny giggled, I belly laughed, my Patron stared, and Princess Peach continued to watch tv. He is a very kind man and very much like his father, which is good.
Last night the Brit came over for tea so we could say our goodbyes. It was sad. I am gonna miss that kid. We had fun though talking and Java, Mother Hen, and Cinderella chatted with us. The Brit can speak Turkish so it was great. This morning I got the kids ready and sent them off to school. Benny was brushing his teeth and looked at me and said, “You are leaving today. I forgot. I am gonna give you a present. What does your littlest sister like? Legos? Barbie or horse Legos maybe?” It was very sweet. Princess Peach hugged me for a long time, “Come back some day ok?” I shook hands with Baba and hugged my Patron. It was nice. Mother Hen made me a cheese panini and said her goodbyes. She asked who was she going to yell at about not wearing socks or who was going to give her a random back massage? I just smiled. What could I say? She kept hugging me as I left. Java had to tell her to let me leave because I was going to be late. It was like a scene form a movie:
Enter with a dark sky with the sun struggling through. To the right the sea with a ranbow draped across. To the left a Turkish mansion. We see Mother Hen hugging our gypse then releases her. Jessica climbed into the car. As the car backs down the long drive Mother Hen blows a kiss and watches until she disappears from Jessica’s view.
All of that is true even the rainbow. That’s a huge rainbow over the sea. It was trying to be a double rainbow but couldn’t quite pull it off.
Final thoughts:
I am glad I came and I am glad I am going. I am not ready to be a mother. I know everyone says it is different with your own kids and I believe them. It’s just when I am here I have the responsibilities of a mother with kids who aren’t mine. It’s sad and frustrating. I have learned many other things about the Lord and myself. Though I am not sure I will be able to tell you about them until later. After some prayerful processing.
One easy lesson I learned is that I can’t save people. Simple revelation maybe but important. Before I left I saw this experience as a game of Cranium. If I answered all the questions right and followed the correct path salvation would come. The more accurately I followed Christ, the more correct prayers I prayed, the more time I spent in worship was one more step closer to their salvation. Don’t get me wrong I still believe in intercessory prayer and worship but it does not determine a person’s salvation. A person determines their own salvation with the Lord. My prayers and worship will plant seeds but only God can make them grow. I pray that the work done in that place was not done in vain. I now pray against the weeds, the birds, and the rocks that will fall among the seeds. God is faithful and I still believe salvation will come.
On a different note, it has been enlightening to see how Christians are viewed outside the United States. In the States we are hypocrites and viewed as religious people pretending to be better than everyone else. Here we are seen as crusaders. Literal crusaders from the 13th century. Our church manipulates to gain power and believers are stupid mindless drones. Dramatic? Maybe. All we have is our reputation. “They will know you by your love.” Why would people want to seek out a God of murderers? God will keep drawing His people to Himself no matter what we do but as a good friend once told me, “That’s no excuse for bad behavior. That’s like saying I’ll just go have sex and then God will work it out. That’s a load of crap and you know it.” I truly believe we can change peoples opinions of the church be fulfilling our original calling. When we leave our buildings and love people, no matter where they are, the image of the modern church will drastically change. The question is are we ready for such reckless love? Am I?
The idealist will rant and rave so you will have to excuse me. Take it with a grain of salt because I am preaching to myself. I am external processor you see. Well it is time to board and I wish I could leave you with some great thought or piece of wisdom but at the end of the day I am 23 and not Aristotle or even Greek for that matter. So as this chapter of my life’s adventure comes to a close a new chapter begins to be written. The next part of the journey is unclear but to this new uncharted territory I yell a resounding, “Talley HO!”
